It isn’t easy to make the decision to seek a divorce — even if the marriage isn’t working, you may still have feelings for your spouse that make it difficult to simply cut and run.
Here are some questions you should ask yourself before you decide:
1. Do you and your spouse know how to communicate?
If there’s a lack of communication, the odds are that your needs aren’t being met — which can ultimately lead to other problems, like infidelity. It’s essential that you feel free to discuss all the important issues in your life with your spouse — but it’s even more essential that you be heard. If you feel like your spouse is no longer interested in what you have to say or has tuned you out, it may be a sign that your marriage really is over.
2. Are you ready to face life without your spouse?
This question requires you to take an honest look at what your spouse brings to the marriage and decide if you can do without those things or provide them for yourself. Your spouse may not be much of a romantic partner, for example, but a good provider.
This step can also help you identify your specific fears about divorce. When you identify what your spouse adds to your life, you also identify what you might lose in a divorce. For example, divorcing a good provider may mean giving up financial security unless you know you’re capable of providing for yourself.
Once you answer this question, you can more easily decide if the marriage is worth keeping.
3. Are you staying because of fear?
Are you afraid of being seen as a failure once you’ve divorced? You may be afraid of financial ruin, the effect it will have on the children or disappointing your parents. You may even be afraid of just being alone again, especially if your marriage has lasted a while.
Marriages can be built on many foundations, but fear isn’t one of them. If you’re staying out of fear, it may be time to seek counseling so that you’re able to move forward.
If you’ve decided that it’s time to seek a divorce, talk to an attorney today. For information about our firms approach to the process, please visit our page.
