Is bird-nesting a fad? Is it a new trend that changes the game? Is it something you want to do after your divorce or can you not imagine how it would ever work?
People have a lot of questions about bird-nesting, as it’s relatively new. Let’s explore what it means, why it works and why it’s difficult.
With bird-nesting, you get a turn to live in the family home with your children. So does your spouse. The child custody arrangement just tells you when it’s your turn. You move into the home when it is and live outside of the home — in another house or apartment — when it’s your ex’s turn.
This works because it means the children do not have to move, as they would with a traditional setup. They get to stay in one stable location. This limits the change that they see in their lives after divorce. It can impact everything from schools to friends to bedrooms to where they keep their favorite toys. It’s really a child-focused approach.
Why it’s difficult may already be clear: You and your ex have to be on good terms. You have to work together and get along. You may not live in the house at the same time, but you still share the home. You may even share the second home, where you live when you’re not with the kids. For some couples, this type of cooperation after divorce is just not possible.
Bird-nesting is a new option and one worth considering. Make sure you carefully look into all of the options you have.